Time worth wasting

Trust me when I say this will be time worth wasting on the computer. So put those children to bed and gather your spouse around -- it's business time!






Our other favorites:
Abli (The racist dragon)
Issues (Think about it)
Jenny

The story

So my friend Erin very nicely reminded me that it's been a little over a month since my last post. Whoops! Ever since going private, I have really slacked on the blogging. It's really weird. When you're public, it shows up on people's blog rolls that you've posted something new so people check out the blog pretty quickly. You pretty much get an instant response to your blog. However, when you're private that stuff doesn't work. People forget to check your blog for a while and sometimes you'll have a post up for days before anyone will notice. I know I know.... lame excuse, but hearing what people think about what I posted is half the reason why I do this. So yeah, that's what I've been the major slacker.

But anyway, here's the best story posted about the leg picture:

Peggy and Reed said: "Actually I thought the JFK story* was FUNNY. But knowing Shane, he just wants to surprise you for Christmas. Do I dare tell you? It might ruin the surprise. He is making you one of those lamps. You know from the movie Christmas Story. He is trying to disquise it until it is done. It will have the fishnet stocking, the lamp and everything. He just put the man's pants and shoes on it to confuse you! Can't wait to see the finished product."

(*JFK story by Marlena: You bought the leg of JFK on ebay!!..Congatulations on your purchase!!!)

I just died when I read Peggy's post because literally just the night before Shane asked me, "What would you think if for christmas I got you a leg lamp -- you know, like the kind from A Christmas Story?" Of course I would think it was the greatest present of all time and then worship him as the all-time gift giving god. So yes, to my amusement I woke up the next morning and found that post by Peggy. Brilliant.

So here's the real story:

The kids and I had just arrived at the pool for Isabelle's swim lessons. We walked into the locker room to get Isabelle dressed when I stopped immediately after seeing THAT. I was so shocked at what I was seeing, that I couldn't move. It was so............... curious. Apprently it's not strange to young children to see a fully clothed bodiless leg, because the kids never even noticed. They were only upset that I wasn't moving them closer to the pool. At that point I faced a real dilemma: To take a picture or not take a picture. You see.... I HAD to have that picture. I NEEDED that picture. Yes, I did realize that it was horribly insensitive to take that picture.... but then again, when was I ever a sensitive person? When Kelly was 3 and wasn't paying attention while walking and walked straight into a stop sign really hard, I laughed hysterically for a good 15 seconds before noticing all the death stares people were giving me. I guess the screaming child should have been tended to first.

So you see? No history of sensitivity here. But there was a bigger problem at hand. Sure I could take the picture, but was the owner of said leg nearby? Would she hop out at just the moment that I was taking the picture and giggling to myself? How would I explain to two children why a one-legged lady was yelling at me? How would I explain that we were banned from the pool for life? Was it worth it? Obviously the answer in my mind was yes. And no, I wasn't caught. But I actually did end up meeting the one-legged lady later in the locker room. Nice lady. Not sure she'd be so nice though if she knew that I had a picture of her leg. Hmmmmm........ I just crossed that line of creepiness, didn't I?

Let's play a little game

So just for fun, we're going to play a little game. I took this picture two days ago and I can't stop looking at it. So what I'm thinking is I would like to hear what YOU guys think the story is behind this picture. I'll post the real story AND the best fake story later. Game on!

Swimmin' Isabelle

For the past couple of months Isabelle has been taking swim lessons at a local pool. I am completely and utterly amazed at the progress she has made so far. At the beginning of this summer, she was still terrified of getting a single drop of water on her face. Bath time was ALWAYS a scream fest. Anyway, at the beginning of the summer, we had one of the young women in our ward giver her some private lessons to help her get over her fear of water. In the beginning I wasn't allowed anywhere near the pool because she would scream bloody murder if I was there. Well, the lessons paid off and Isabelle quickly got over her fear of the water. We spent the rest of the summer just playing at the pool. She still didn't like to swim without her floatie, but she had no problems putting her face in the water anymore. When summer ended and kelly went back to school, we needed something for Isabelle to do during the week. Preschool was too expensive and every other kind of class (dance, gymnastics, etc...) were outrageously expensive as well. Then we stumbled across these swim lessons that were SO cheap and the class sizes were small. So far it's been fantastic. The two other kids in her class are super sweet and they all get along well together. The other moms that go there are super nice as well, so that's always fun.

So yeah, Isabelle's doing great and I hope you like the video!

Points to ponder

So my poor little Kelly girl is sick. She woke up this morning puking into a bowl. That was exceptionally considerate of her since cleaning up pukey clothes/blankets without a washer and dryer can be really annoying. We are very lucky in that our kids hardly ever get sick. We attribute it to Isabelle's diseased little pillow she carries around everywhere. It's the most disgusting looking thing you've ever seen and it's always smooshed to her face. But I'm tellin' ya, it's better than vaccines! But anyway, Isabelle and I didn't feel like cooking lunch since we had been helping Kelly all morning, so we decided to order chinese. While we ate, I looked over at the couch and it struck me that Kelly was actually sleeping. No kidding, I actually got up to check to see if she was breathing. You see, Kelly was never a good sleeper and she's an even worse napper. She quit taking naps at the age of 18 months -- no lie! Even the accidental naps on long road trips stopped well before her 2nd birthday. So while Isabelle and I are eating I remembered when 2 years ago Kelly fell asleep on the couch during the day. She was waiting for Shane's parents to come for a visit. Her and Isabelle kept talking excitedly about when they were going to show up. I left the room to put some things away and when I came back 10 minutes later, kelly was on her back on the couch with her eyes closed. I completely freaked out and ran over to her thinking I was going to have to start CPR (I'm not kidding folks.... these were my true thoughts!). Right when I was about to shake her, she let out this big breath. The darn kid was SLEEPING! She was about 4 or 5 at this time and I swear to you, the last time she had napped during the day was easily 2 years prior. Totally freaky.

So as I am remembering this story, Isabelle picks up her Hunan Beef and says "Mmmmm... this is some GOOD brown rice!". To continue with her joke, she picked up her brown rice and said "This crab rangoon is DE-licious!" All the while giggling to herself. At that point my mind wondered and thought "What if you could raise your kids totally secluded from the outside world and you taught them all the wrong words for things. So instead of calling beef "beef", you called it rice instead. It's still english, just totally mixed up. But what if you did that with LOTS of things?? "I need to go wash my hair with syrup in the barn" and so on.... Then, when they reached school age, you plopped them in public school and watched the story unfold.

I'm scaring you, aren't I? Well, do you expect much else from me?

Well, you can expect this: I was already partially through this post when Kelly woke up. I really wanted to get a picture of her sleeping (you know, for dramatic effect). So yeah, I told her to pretend to sleep so I could get the pic. Yeah.... that's what you can expect from me.


Well, on a happier and less weird note, Kelly had her birthday this past week. She turned 7 years old! Can you believe it? Next year my baby will be getting baptized! Anyway, this year we decided to really scale back on the celebrations. We normally do a pretty big party at a park, but it was time for something smaller and easier on my sanity. Kelly was allowed to pick one friend to come and she chose her best friend Emma from school. Since we're really good friends with her family, we invited her older sister Bailey to come as well. Kelly really wanted to go to the park to play, and so we did. Well, for a little while at least. Right after we got there Isabelle had to go to the bathroom really bad. The bathrooms were stupidly locked (why have public restrooms if you freakin' lock them all the time?!?!?!?!) Anyway, Bailey and I tried to convince her that peeing behind a bush was cool. She eventually gave in and gave it a try. Well, she did it alright. But unfortunately I didn't aim her right and she peed all over her pants. Ugh.... I tried not to laugh too hard because I knew she was embarrassed. I guess there goes my chances of not scarring my children for life.

So anyway, Kelly had a lot of fun even though we had to bolt from the park early. Happy birthday sweetheart!

Halloween party time

Our ward had a halloween party this past weekend and the kids had a ton of fun. The girls enjoyed getting dressed up in their costumes and getting tons of free candy (I mean, come on... who wouldn't???)

Kelly is a black kitty cat. I know she looks like a mouse right now, but she DOES have a cat tail on!


Isabelle went as a pink bunny rabbit. I'm not sure why she wanted the weird smiley face painted on her, but she was adament that she needed it.



Shane went as Gob the Magician. I'm going to assume most of you don't know who that is. He's a character from Arrested Development. Basically Gob is the worst magician of all time. Shane kept doing stupid card tricks all night that didn't even work, but the kids thought they were so cool. My husband IS cool! (And for those of you who DO know who Gob is, we even brought a CD player to play his theme music -- The Final Countdown!)


I wasn't sure what I was thinking when I got this costume. Yes... I am a california raisin. Okay, I guess I DID know what I was thinking when I bought that costume, but my thinking was definitely flawed. I saw it in a thrift store for $4 and thought "Hey! That's an easy costume and really really funny!" I was especially sold when it came with it's own "I'm drug free" ribbon. So yeah, in theory it was a great idea and very funny. However, in practice it was NOT a great idea and NOT very funny. It smelled really bad even though I washed and febreezed the heck out of it. It's made of foam, so it wasn't exactly breathable material and the two eye holes it gave me provided very little vision. The only thing funny about it was that it scared the little kids half to death. Literally. I had two 3 year olds that were seriously on the verge of crying I was freaking them out so much. That possibly could have been worth wearing it.

Well, before I go I will leave with you a short video of Shane doing one of his card "tricks". I wish I could have gotten a video of some of his funnier tricks, but this will do. I think the Young Women were slightly confused by the trick.... lol!

Gallrein Farm

Last weekend my dad invited us to join him at the Gallrein Farm (I think I spelled that right). Anyway, it was loads of fun picking pumpkins, riding a horse-drawn hay ride, riding ponies, and playing in the hay. Oh, and don't forget the awesome music! (My dad and his friend Joe provided the music that day)





If you look really close, there is a worm in that sucker. And yes, it's supposed to be there. For some reason my dad thought the kids or I would like it. Um.......... So yeah, if anybody wants a sucker with a tasty worm in it, give me a hollar! I've got one I can spare.